The girl who was never born.

When she was born , she was hailed as a prince

To rule over all that her eyes surveyed

But with what will she rule

When she herself was pervaded

With the shroud of a different identity!

The world expected her to be different!

She was named a boy.

Her curls fought every month to stop the scissor blades

From slicing them into pieces

And crumbling her dreams to nothing.

While she longed for a doll and dress

He clothes were utterly pressed

And she was sent forcibly to a boy’s school.

Come on , Boy’s don’t cry !

Boy’s don’t behave like girls

Boy’s don’t like colors.

Loving colors was a crime!

From the first days of childhood she was judged

Judged shunned and treated like an animal

An animal which is to be feared

Because it doesn’t conform to norms

Because it breaks all the myths and shatters all the barriers

Marked as an abomination of nature

She struggled

Struggled to prove that she was nature.

Just like a butterfly who needs a cocoon to transform

To transform from a caterpillar into a magnificent butterfly

Then came the day when finally everyone saw her as she was

A beautiful woman

Her dad loved her as a princess

Prince never-so-charming and charming to came to court her

Her life was like a bed of roses

Occasionally strewn with more than enough thorns

And too many rejections and scorns.

But she did not stop

She grew and grew

And out of her balcony flew into an era of freedom.

Freedom from all the confines and fears

And all the swords and spears of life.

-Soumita Das

 

 

long time no see… Life happened!!!

Well , it’s been a long time since i have penned down my thoughts or rather typed them. the basic thing was marriage happened!! yes!! I’m finally married to the “love of my life” and it’s going to be almost one year into the journey. I’m away from my home, my sweet bed and as usual although the love of my life is the sweetest thing that happened to me. His family however was not especially my mother-in- law. Well yes, she is the usual kind of evil like every mother-in-laws usually are! Lucky are such brides who have experienced mum-in-laws who are just angels reborn.

In India, the country I live in, the brides after their marriage and the mum-in -laws after their son’s marriage join special kitty party groups most of the range from “How i hate my bahu (daughter-in -law) to How horrendous is your MIL. [From hence forth in the blog i will refer Mother-in-law as MIL and Daughter-in-Law as DIL ]. The war is never ending and the brides sometimes even keep on comparing with each other .. “Oh my gawd! You are so lucky .. you know when i went into my in-laws place my MIL used to treat me as a maid and made me work though out the day .. cooking 12-20 dishes gourmet style and then washing clothes, laundry and then even picking up the clothes for dry cleaning and so on ans so forth. The atrocities are appalling. Some times people tell me how lucky I am that i don’t have to stay at my in- laws place because we work in this residential school which is thankfully far far away from home. Phew!

 

I know I sound like I’m filled with so much negativity but such is the situation here trust me. I know i have better hopes oh you anonymous readers trusting me than my in-laws who always feel either I’m not their type or I’m up to no good. My rantings will go on and on but I don’t want to focus on this negativity I want to throw away this past and look forward into a happy life of togetherness with the love of my life now that I have finally go to be with him forever and forever.Also I will not allow any one to come in between the two loves of my life, writing and ofcourse my husband! It’s abut time that I stood up! And so shall I gracefully stand!

i want to be yours~

We keep laughing and talking nonsense and amidst all the nonsense you look at me and that one look tells me what is on your mind.. one look and all words are meaningless and I realise we do not need words to talk..Just like the best pictures are captured through your eyes and not by our cameras.. I want to be the air  you breath so that I reach your heart and flow in you with your blood.. I want to be the clothes you wear so that I smell of you the whole day.. I want to be the water you drink so that I can run out of you as your sweat .. 😛 I want to be the clay you work with so that you mould me , make me and break me in your arms and fingers… I want to be everything that you look at.. be in your mind.. thoughts and dreams.. let me be everything you desire because for you my heart is on fire~

randoms :)

Love is when you make him sing that random sweet song 10 thousand times over and over again just to make him overtly conscious about it and then finally reqsuesting him to sing again unconsciously with the other wise rough, sexy voice which he has normally 😛 Love is when u smile “bhodaily” at him through skype and even tell him he looks cute even when he’s wearing his worst sweat pantz 😛 then again to be reminded by him it is those sweats which you have already profusely expressed your dislike previously.. and then you realize it’s the person you are mad about and you don’t care even if he\she is stark naked 😛 *ok on a serious note u care 😉 u definitely do 😛 for such eye soothing , tempting treats heheheheheh 😉 * Love is when even at the middle of the night you feel like laughing to every jokes he cracks and stay awake for him cause he is working ; even though u come to a point when “chokhe deshlai kathi gujte hobe” to stay awake! Love is when you keep oogling at his blue shirt with a hungry smile 😉 love is when he realises all your moves, groves and thoughts and responds to them with the same amount of spark and smirk 😛 love is when you keep on saying aloud and in your mind.. Come soon hither!!! 😉 😛

trying to get your attention…

I am not interested to know wether you are going to buy me a diamond ring (although I wouldn’t say no to it) . I am not interested to know wether you think I am the prettiest girl in the world. I like materials, I am materialistic but I spare you such horrors because I sincerely want to be with you. Therefore I am more interested in the fact that wether you want to be with me or do you really have the courage of holding my hand in front of your friends and introduce me to them saying “ etai sei daini ta” the one who bewitched me ! I sincerely hate cheap public displays of emotion but still I wish for the day when I would find you commenting something which touches my heart on my FB wall which will be open to all not hidden from everyone’s views! I know these r not important rather they r cheap nd I never aspire to give photos of u and me kissing on fb (then again i seldom have oportunity to even touch ur hand kissing is a hard limit of centuries because you are never here!). It is hardto be alone , you may say “ami eka nei tor cheye dure ?” but that dosent make it easy . I shout at you nd for that im sorry  but then are you that dumb to not even notice that im shouting at you to make me yours???!!